Dad: "Why argue one of the two best human pleasures? Food. The other, I will leave you to answer."
Me: "LOLZ" *clears throat*
Dad: "And chocolate is a food, so try again."
He knows me far too well.
Tuesday, October 8, 2013
Friday, October 4, 2013
When you lick your own butthole, you forfeit the right to be a picky drinker.
Riddle me this:
Our cats have almost always had a strange aversion to a particular water bowl. We have two matching sets of bowls: one pink and white, one multi-colored, and we fill one of each with food and one of each with water. 99% of the time, the water in one bowl will go completely untouched, and sometimes, both will be untouched if there are floaties or kibble in them. Her royal spoiledness:
Today, Hubby reads me something off the great intarwebz: domestic cats, evidently, have an instinctual aversion to water bowls placed beside food bowls. This is supposedly because cats in the wild will not drink water anywhere near a kill that they are eating, because the water might be contaminated from the kill.
You know, because cats are so much smarter than we give them credit for.
And because there's no possible way a dead animal, in itself, could contain potentially disgusting and dangerous bacteria.
And also because neither of the two aforementioned priss-pants have ever done anything less than sanitary.
Or clever.
I'm going to go move their food bowls away from their water bowls. And then I'm going to spend the day gradually adding small floating objects just to dick with them.
Our cats have almost always had a strange aversion to a particular water bowl. We have two matching sets of bowls: one pink and white, one multi-colored, and we fill one of each with food and one of each with water. 99% of the time, the water in one bowl will go completely untouched, and sometimes, both will be untouched if there are floaties or kibble in them. Her royal spoiledness:
and her slightly less intellectually gifted sister-friend:
are puking, pooping, rug-tinkling, bug-eating, lactating-boob-licking, disgusting beasts. And yet, we somehow happen to have two Super Sweet Sixteen monsturds on our hands who will not have it any other way than theirs. It takes talent to be both disgusting slobs AND picky prissy bitches.
Today, Hubby reads me something off the great intarwebz: domestic cats, evidently, have an instinctual aversion to water bowls placed beside food bowls. This is supposedly because cats in the wild will not drink water anywhere near a kill that they are eating, because the water might be contaminated from the kill.
You know, because cats are so much smarter than we give them credit for.
And because there's no possible way a dead animal, in itself, could contain potentially disgusting and dangerous bacteria.
And also because neither of the two aforementioned priss-pants have ever done anything less than sanitary.
Or clever.
I'm going to go move their food bowls away from their water bowls. And then I'm going to spend the day gradually adding small floating objects just to dick with them.
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